Category: Funny

Top Ten Things to Do When You’re Left Alone at the Doctor

8/2/2011

I had to write about this because Kristina and I have been tagging along to each others doctors appointments since we were teenagers. Like most of you I am sure you go to the doctor and after the nurse takes your vitals you are left alone for quite a bit of time. Kristina and I have come up with a list of the top ten fun things to do to help you pass the time.

10. Sing out loud to yourself or the person with you

9. Make a pyramid out of the paper cups

8. Lick all the tongue depressors and put them back

7. See how many rubber gloves you can stick inside your purse before the doctor comes in.

6. Make eye glasses out of paper cups and ear funnels. (see picture below)

5. Stick a bunch of Band-Aids all over your body such as face, arms, ect and see if the doctor notices.

4. Spin the stool all the way to the top so when the doctor comes in they have to hop to sit down.

3. Pull the stirrups out of the bed and get situated. This is the greatest if you’re a man.

2. Take your pants off and wait, then when the doctor comes in tell him your head hurts.

1. Sit on the bed backwards with the stirrups out and rubber gloves on your hands, ear funnels in your ears, band aids on, and a tongue depressor sticking out of the back of your pants. When the doctor comes in just look at him like you have no idea what the problem is.

Hopefully your doctor will have a sense of humor. Kristina and I have encountered many doctors over the years and some laugh and find us hilarious and others think we are nuts. Which maybe true lol we are still waiting for the results back on that.

Lots of love!

*Amanda*

Don’t forget to come back often as we are updating with all new fabulous thing that you don’t want to miss.

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Good Times in Twilight Country

7/24/2011

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A few months back, the two of us, and our two very awesome friends Barbie and Sheryl went on a little road trip to Forks, WA. Yup, that's right. We are Twi-hards. Or Twi-dorks. Or grown women obsessed with sparkly vampires. Yes, we own it all! We had a wonderful time bonding, and seeing the sights. We all loved the beach at La Push and took way way too many pictures! We will many of our pictures in time, but there are a few I really want to share today!

At every shop in Forks, they have Twilight memorabilia everywhere and often some cardboard cutouts of the cast. At the Forks Visitors Center we actually got to "borrow" Edward and take him out to play a little! That was some of the most fun we had on the trip!

Amanda steals a kiss!

Kristina and Edward.... pale in the sunlight!

Amanda makes Edward look like he has a tan!

Barbie gets fresh!

Sheryl smiles pretty!

Oh no! Sheryl pushed her luck with the shoulder squeeze!

It's on BITCH!

And we are friends again over a good meal and a few glasses of wine!

One final picture for you Twi-Haters out there!

XOXO

Kristina ~~

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My Sacred Place by Kristina

7/22/2011

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We have been doing a series of posts where we ask our guest bloggers to tell us about their sacred places. It is my turn to share with you about mine.

In order to tell you about it, I have to start a bit farther back in my spiritual journey.

I grew up LDS.* I am not a member of the church anymore, but it serves as a very important part in the development of who I am. Growing up, the places that were holy, and required reverence were many. Churches, Sunday dinner, family occasions, and many more. The places that were sacred, were not nearly as common. The Temple is sacred.

The Salt Lake City, Utah Temple, courtesy of LDS.org

There are 144 LDS Temples throughout the world. These are sacred places that members of the church go to, regularly if possible, or as a pilgrimage much like Muslims going to Mecca. These buildings are breathtakingly beautiful, and painstakingly built to exacting specifications, to represent the highest craftsmanship and honor of the LDS church. It is a privilege to go into these temples, and a reverence of the highest degree is expected when you enter.
Upon leaving the LDS church, and finding a new path in the world, I found myself lacking in places that felt sacred to me.

But then I began to understand sacred to mean something totally different. Where before, sacred meant something I could rarely experience, and only in a specific place, I now know that I can find sacredness anyplace, at any time if I will only allow myself.

Sacred was a feeling of quiet reflection, lack of outside interference, and beautiful, rarely seen surroundings. Sacred now is a feeling of love, happiness, peace, and a fullness in my heart. The moments when I look at those I love are the most sacred ones to me. The feelings that wash over me when I hold my son, or when I see my best friend's beautiful baby twins learning to stand and walk. It is also the feeling of my breath being pulled from me, as if by the moon and the tides, when I look at the ocean.

The smell of my son when he is fresh out of the bath.

The look of laughter when we finally say UNCLE to a tickle fight!

The look of happy delirium and amazement on her face when her twins arrived safely.

The joy of a day spent with my siblings

The sweetness of my brand new baby boy

The wonder of watching the twins grow bigger every day

An afternoon with my books and something delicious to drink

The Ocean that takes my breath away

Just as these pictures were hard for me to pick from the hundreds I have saved, it is hard for me to pick out the moments in my life that are sacred. Because there are so many. The feeling of sacredness, now, is a moment when I stop and step outside of what is ordinary, and experience the fullness of a moment. The fullness of my life. When I look at those people and things that I love, and simply allow myself to feel that love. That is my sacred place!

* I mean absolutely no disrespect to anyone who is LDS, or to the LDS church. There are many wonderful things about the LDS religion, and many wonderful people who belong to it. It simply isn't for me. My personal experiences do not necessarily reflect the beliefs or intents of the LDS church as a whole. They simply represent my experience with it.

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To hear or not to hear?

7/15/2011

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OK so I know this like most of my post will sound funny but as always there is a great story to go along with it. This story involves my friendship with Kristina and how cool she really is.

OK picture it the year is 1995 I had braces and spit a lot and she had purple hair. Yes it really was that bad. Anyway to start off I should tell you that I have a hearing disability that I was born with and I only have 13% hearing in my left ear. As a kid this was horrible as I had to wear hearing aids and different devices in school and everyone always looked at me like I was weird. Now this maybe because I was also talking to myself but that is for another time. Well Kristina knew I couldn’t hear well and NEVER made fun of me or even made me feel like I had a disability. She was awesome she even invented this game where I would lay down with my right ear covered and she would speak and I would repeat what I thought she was saying. Which was for the most part always wrong, an example would be like this….

Amanda lying on right ear with eyes closed

Kristina giggling while thinking of something to say

“I love to eat pickles” say Kristina

“I am a dove with a Popsicle” Amanda says

Anyway you get the idea. This went on for years and I always found the game just as funny as Kristina did. Then one day she heard me telling this story to someone else and with the horrified look on their face we both realized this might not seem funny to other people.

OK one more thing before I go, Kristina also cant see very well and that is putting it nicely causes lets face it this girl is BLIND BLIND BLIND and I mean so blind that if she takes out her contacts and your standing in front of her holding and orange she will knock you over trying to figure out how the orange is floating in mid air. This is because she can see colors and oddly nothing else. You can probably imagine the fun we have with each other.

Lots of love!

*Amanda*

Don’t forget to come back often as we are updating with all new fabulous thing that you don’t want to miss.

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Because you deserve to smile

7/6/2011

1 Comment

We all know that getting a good laugh or big smile is one of the best feelings in the world so here are a couple pictures that always make me laugh and I will tell you why.

LOL this is so Kristina and if you were to take a way the word FOO and replace it with Muthafucka it would be her even more.

I think we should all think of this before posting on face book. Right?

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The Sacred Village

Top Ten Things to Do When You’re Left Alone at the Doctor

Good Times in Twilight Country

My Sacred Place by Kristina

To hear or not to hear?

Because you deserve to smile

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